Yeah, I know it happened last Thursday and I probably should have written something about it by now, but I had other things to do and frankly the Weiner story has had just about as much sauce squeezed out of it as we’re likely to get. But, I suppose that since I wrote about the beginning, I should write about the end.
US Representative Anthony Weiner shocked absolutely nobody on Thursday when he resigned amid the final passionate throws of the Weinergate scandal. Weiner had vowed to stay firm in his resolve and not pull out of his seat but the continual and insistent push back from Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi forced the eventual climax of explosive political pressure resulting in the withering of Weiner’s resolve. Even so, Weiner said he would stay in and try to keep doing the job, but Pelosi insisted that he just wouldn’t be effective in a diminished capacity. In the end, spent and depleted, Weiner slipped out almost entirely unnoticed.
This certainly isn’t the legacy that he was hoping for. But at least for the foreseeable future, whenever somebody says wiener at a picnic, somebody else is going to remember and perhaps even giggle a little about the Weiner in Washington that couldn’t stay in the pants and out of the limelight. The photogenic penis that ended a Weiner’s career; in short, Weiner’s wiener. Snort, haw haw, thigh slap…. aw that guy was such a moron…
So what is the newly former representative going to do with the rest of his career? If he wants to stay in government and make use of his “talents” he may want to make inquiries with the Berlussconi government in Italy. I don’t know for sure, but I would suspect that any bunga bunga party worth its probable scandal , would include quite a few phone camera pictures of junk, trunks and bunks as well as a villa full of 17-year-old “actresses” with “political aspirations”.
If national / international politics are not to Mr. Weiner’s taste I know that a spot at the International Monetary Fund (IMF) World Bank has opened up for the next 2 to 5 years. Apparently, not being able to discern acceptable and unacceptable behavior is such a plus at the World Bank that they put people like that in charge of the whole thing.
I have to admit… I’m disappointed. Genuinely.
I continue to be disappointed by people in power because of how they behave when they have that power. However, I’ve come to the realization that it isn’t their fault. It’s mine. I expect them to behave like I think the rest of us should behave. As it turns out, we, people, humans, behave like children or animals when we get the opportunity.. almost universally.
When our leaders behave like the rest of us we are all shocked because wow, they’re animals just like us.
We stomp our feet and want what we want. We’re petulant and greedy. We’re petty and egocentric. Fearful and filled with false bravado. We’re cartoons or monkeys or maybe even cartoon monkeys. Men think mostly with their dicks or their stomachs. Young, sexually charged and attractive women are drawn to powerful men because of an evolutionary drive for security. Middle aged men cheat on their wives because they feel time slipping away and they see a time coming when it will be too late and the opportunity will never come again. Mature women gasp about it because they’ve forgotten that they waved their tails and pushed up their boobs in front of the biggest baboons when they were young.
Men want to still be young and strong and do the things young men do without the thought or wisdom that comes with responsibility or station. They want to cut loose, get drunk, smoke a bunch of pot and lay in a bed with a dozen willing young women. Of course, nobody can actually do that except the most powerful and wealthy of men but for some reason we expect that when a man achieves the ability to do something like that, that he will have the strength of character to not do it or at least the cunning to not get caught.
We are, all of us, a couple of generations from the trees and we like to feel good; we’ve evolved to be happy about eating and sex and safety from being eaten. We like to do those things in order to make the happy juice in our brains. On top of all that we have a thin veneer of civilization wherein we’ve agreed to some basic rules about how we should our shouldn’t behave regarding ownership, sex and killing. But it is an extremely thin veneer. Beneath it all, we still seethe with jungle passion.
My civilized veneer is disappointed again with Weiner and those like him who feel compelled to lead yet have failed the moral character test. The monkey in my head just thinks he has an interesting and plausible method for attracting willing females.